The importance of antennas

No, not "antennae" - that's what insects have. Antennas, as in aerials. Sticky-up or sticky-out bits of wire that mysteriously capture signals from the thick soup of radio-frequency data that's whizzing through the ether as we speak.

Perhaps you've got a long-forgotten Yagi in your loft or strapped to your chimney. A sat-dish on your wall or whatever. How soon we forget the importance of these humble items of hardware, yet we are becoming ever more reliant upon wireless communications technology.

Let me really drive this home with a concrete example:

• No antennae, no automated irrigation systems.
• No automated irrigation systems, no strawberries.
• No strawberries, no Wimbledon.

You see? Tennis itself relies upon technicians willing to spend hour after hour experimenting with bits of bent wire.

Yesterday I visited the home of the perfect strawberry with a view to helping to create the ultimate wireless irrigation management system. Dr. Alcock's technical expertise combined with The Secret Laboratory's 40 years of soldering experience is certain to secure the future of UK sporting excellence for years to come.

Watch this space.